How We Keep Our Fears

I am a photographer. I carry a camera around and record imagery that expresses the feelings I have about my life. The photographs are an attempt to bridge the gap between your life and mine. I see things that you might also see, I feel things that you might also feel.

I am afraid all of the time. Of losing my family, my friends, my country, my life. Those who know me know I’ve had several experiences one might call “near death.”

Walking through life holding my breath and waiting for the next dangerous experience to befall me is no way to live. Yet fear lingers.

So I ask questions. Who else is afraid? Is everyone? I want to learn from people I know, people I have not yet met, people I will likely never meet. I want to hear their stories. Try to comprehend fears I have never been exposed to, pull myself out of my own experience for long enough to feel something different. Shake myself out of complacency and remember that there are many other realities in the world.

The first time I started asking people questions, it saved my life. I was severely depressed and was turned completely inward. I realized that if I did not reach out and discover how other people coped with the same life struggles, I wasn’t sure where I would end up. People were generous, they answered, and it propelled me forward. I felt lucky (and selfish!) and I wanted to know more.

So I continue to photograph. I continue to ask questions.

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